nadjarachel_import: (hooded face)

Ramblings of a Random Mind

...inside the thoughts of an elven hoofcat...

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Created on 2017-04-11 19:40:51 (#3035097), last updated 2017-04-13 (23 weeks ago)

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Birthdate:Apr 17
Location:Ohio, United States of America
Hello, my name is Rachel.

I'm Irish, German, with a smidge of Seneca Native American, and I live in Denver, Colorado. I will be 21 in spring.

I classify myself as both otherkin, and a theriantrope. The prior, I am an elf, and the latter, I am a cat and a horse. Arabian Horse, to be exact for the latter. The prior is still not quite figured out, though I've settled on mostly totemic, with strong Jaguar leanings (that might be theriantropic), for the time being. Elf-wise, I am of the Norse variety, not the Celtic, though of what *sort* of Norse variety, I couldn't say. ...I also have strange, shifty-wings (often crow wings), though I think those are archetypal in several forms, and don't claim them as 'kin-related. 'Kin is something that continues to be under debate in my own mind, and often makes me a bit uneasy (due to the 180 that this facet of my identity would take if even part of my guessings were accurate), so you will likely hear me spout off a few posts there.

I am a multiple, though I have never come close to accepting the label till now, due to recent events. I have had three headmates, all due to trauma. One was Shadow, and she is the only one who I have succeeded in integrating fully back into myself. The next is Alyssa, and she has been around for quite a while longer than I had originally thought-over a year now-and I am almost certain she's acquired separation from myself, dissociation though she originally was. She currently is almost as strong a presence in front/outside the head as I am. The last is James, and although he has not achieved separation from me, he is very solidly his own person...and I would advise against calling him (or Alyssa) a personality or treating him as less than his own person, if you ever meet him, as he is the type that will bluntly (if not rudely) put you in your place. He's a bit of a (self-admitted) ass, he's not that great with people, and he's not out except by request due to this. All of my headmates, past or present, have long stories. Contact me, or them, if you wish to know more of them, and you'll likely hear what anyone's willing (or able) to tell. They very occasionally post up here, however they are much more private than I am...and I've a sneaking suspicion they don't see much point to posting repeat information from a different perspective.

I am polytheistic, polyamorous, and also bisexual. I'm currently dating one person in another multiple system. Alyssa is dating another person in the same multiple system. The Morrighan is my patron, and she's of the Celtic pantheon, though I do not claim any religion. Pagan is as close as I could come, if I must choose a label. Couldn't give you a tradition to save my life. I have had vague associations with several other deities, though I'm not any of theirs. Please feel free to message me if you want to know more of this strain of things. I'm not too closed off about it-so long as the person isn't annoyingly fluffy, however the filters *are* tighter than some, so I like to know the people I put on them first.

I am a Rennie, meaning that I frequent Rennfaires on a regular basis, in garb and character and all. I frequent GLMF only at this point, mostly because I haven't gotten a chance to explore other faires. I also roleplay on a regular basis; I play several LARP's and a couple tabletop RPGs as well.

I am a night owl, most alive and at my best at night, in moon and stars. I am most at home in woods with plains and mountains closeby, and hiking and climbing is a favorite pasttime of mine, as is horseback riding.

I am an avid Tolkien fanatic, in particular LotR and the elvish bits of that. Though, I may be a bit biased there. Another pastime I fancy is calligraphy, though mostly any writing that I've done that is anything aside from my normal handwriting is done in Tengwar, which is Tolkien's elvish alphabet. Yes, I am that big of a geek. ;-) It comes in handy when wanting to disguise one's words.

Period costuming is my main hobby, and I hope to use it to help make a living eventually. I focus-so far-mostly on Victorian era, bellydance and gypsy, and 11-15th century (think King Arthur, or Robin Hood) garb. I've started to dabble into corsetry as well, so far I've made two corsets-one that failed, one which I'm rather proud of.

I am also bipolar, diagnosed at age 8. It's rather annoying, but I've learned to deal with it far better than I had. You will, however, encounter much emotional stuff-all of which I transcribe up here is incredibly intense-that is filtered, so you only have to read it if you really want to. Not directly connected to the bipolar, I can also be incredibly snarky, nigh on bitchy on more intense days. If you don't like/can't tolerate snark...well, I've given my warning label, my posts aren't gonna be labeled with "insert snark here". Don't read if you don't deal with it.

This is a very brief and somewhat incomplete sum-up of who I am. If you wish to know more of me, or more of what I've written-and don't already-then feel free to contact or add me. Although a message telling me who you are and a bit about you (if your profile says nothing or close-to-nothing) will do wonders for my willingness to add you. ...Also, and this is going to seem a bit elitist, please have your journal written in English, at least by vast majority...mostly because I can't read any other alphabet but Tolkien's elvish, currently, and I don't think that font's a choice on LJ. I won't add people whose writings I can't read/ point there. I won't add you in return until/unless I'm comfortable with the idea, but it never hurts to try.

Also, if I add you back, look and comment here, which is my filters post, telling me a smidgen about you and what filters you want to be on. If you want to put the bit about you in a message, thats perfectly fine, but I need to know a little about you before I add you to my filters. Telling me to go look at your profile is long as there is stuff about you in your profile. If you don't both tell me a bit about yourself, and if you don't go comment to the filterspost, you will not have access to any posts but the generic friends only ones until/unless you do.

Ah yes, and before I forget: I come with warning labels. Quite a few, as I tend to be a rather corrosive being if you're not given advance warning.

One: I am still on the end portion of all my identity puzzlings, so there will be writings on that subject, which are likely redundant. And which will likely get annoying if you've read too many. These can be in the fashion of dream posts, memory posts, "what am I" posts, past life posts, any variety of things.

Two: I am a VERY intense and reactionary person, both in what I send out and what I recieve. And I am very much in tune with my emotions, maybe too much so. Because of this, my emotion filter gets used quite often, sometimes in small frequency, sometimes in great. I have a filter for any high-emotion or emotion-based/sourced posts that I make. I am not too picky with whom I put on it. However, I will suggest now that you do not request it unless you're able to take the intensity that often is in those posts.

Three: Going along with the mass-emotion-content strain of thought here. I have a huge temper. Too huge of a temper. It is one of my main problems. One that goes along with that is my penchant for manifesting any negativity as anger, whether or not it may become so. Also, I have a penchant for angsty/wangsty crap. I sometimes have massive depression problems. I have been suicidal somewhere around two to four times, and most of the time, it's obvious, even if I don't spell it out. Also, as I mentioned above, I have a penchant to overreact. This often equals panicking, flailing, being frantic, over-stressing, and various and sundry other suitable descriptors. I sum it up in paperbagging. There is a story that goes along with that term. Ask if you want to hear it, it's rather funny. However, my temper, depression, and paperbagging often poke their ways into my writings, no matter the filter.

Four: As you have likely noticed from my profile, I ramble. A lot. A lot a lot. I love detail. I love recieving all the detail I can, and I often put far too much into my own givings, due to both my upbringing and my love of recieving it. LONG POSTS. Often, they take quite a while to read. They are, when I remember, individually labeled in the cut if they're LONG. But not always. Hence it is here.

Five: I have a massive sense of humor. I love being on both the giving and recieving end of jokes, so long as whoever the joke is not at the expense of the recieving party. However, my sense of humor, what I find funny, has a penchant for getting me in trouble. I somehow manage to make hugely distant connections to things in my head, and have a habit of laughing at the wrong time. This tends to irk people, which, well...duh. Also. I have a massive curiosity streak. I have an unfortunate habit of asking too many questions due to curiosity, which can easily lead into me accidentally prying into places I shouldn't be. This, also, irks people. This, also, is a duh. Although, I have been working on that and do not ask near as many questions as I did. If I am crossing boundaries with either my sense of humor or my curiosity, feel free to put me in my place. Politeness (not simply civility) is appriciated, as there's a good chance I a) am not meaning ill and/or b) don't know I'm crossing boundaries, but since these things tend to piss people off, it's not expected.

Six: I also have moments where I get uber-protective and my healer complex flares. This, combined with my curiosity streak, tends to get me in Very Large amounts of trouble, as it far more easily (and commonly) ends up in me prying where I don't belong, and worse, there are circumstances where the healer streak won't *quite* let me back off until a while after I realize I should, even if my curiosity streak has taken a dip into the negative. My sincere apologies if any of you have, or end up, dealing with this one. Luckily, this one does not often enter into my writing. This warning label is here just in case it does.

Seven: I am admittedly a great bitch. I classify myself as one of the (mostly) endearing ones, rather than the ones that need to be shot. I am also, on many occasions, an ass. This means that there are occasions where I don't give a shit, hate the world, am the opposite of compassionate, generally want to be left the hell alone, and am generally a real huge pain in the ass to deal with. And I am usually aspecting, which makes it more annoying. There are occasions where there are posts that blatantly display this.

Eight: I at times have an over-penchant for bitching or angsting about my family and my job. My family gets mashed in with my Emotion filter, and I have one for work. These will, likely, be used fairly often with how relations are between my family and I, and how stressful my job is.

Nine: I have many, many issues. Most of which are sourced in variations of my past, and which carry into the now. There are times that I make posts describing these issues and why I have them, insomuch as I am able. You don't have to read these if you don't like, however if you do, these are often fairly angsty or depressive. And all of these leave me very vulnerable, easily affected, and feeling like I've gone on a huge limb with posting them. Please, if you read them, be gentle with me with them.

Ten: Sort of (but not entirely) goes with the prior. I have a sexuality filter. This filter exists for a reason. I am, normally, rather plain in them. I don't hide blatancy for the comfort of the people reading. I don't go into much detail, at all, but what I *do* put out there is fairly blunt and unreserved. Also, I am into BDSM (although BDSM is not in any synonymous with sex for me), and when I am in the right (or wrong, depending) moods, there will be BDSM related posts. I would suggest not requesting added to the sexuality filter unless you are comfortable reading such things, though if you are alright with the potential discomfort, by all means request away. Continuing from the last label, however, some of my issues are sexual. Some are also BDSM related. These are some of the ones I am affected by the most severely, as evidenced by the type of reaction I tend to have.

Last: As you have figured out, I swear. Plenty. If you don't like it, either deal with it, or do not read my journal. It's my journal, and it is in very large part a tool for me to work past things, in addition to the uses of keeping in contact and getting to know people. I will not curb my tongue on my own territory.

Again, I apologize for the length and number of warning labels, but as I said: I tend to be a bit of an overwhelming person without advance warning. I attempt to give all posts I make any proper warning labels, but there's no guarantee I'll remember. My short term memory is complete crap. My long term memory is damn good compared to the prior, but it's not even close to eidetic.

So yes, o ear-talked-off one. My name's Rachel. Its a pleasure to meet you. ^_^
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